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You’re on your way to work, checking your Blackberry as you rush down the street, when you bump into a man. He gives his apologies, pays you a compliment and you engage in brief chit-chat before eventually exchanging numbers and heading on your way.Later that evening he calls and you spend the entire night into the morning getting to know him. He’s tall, dark, handsome, college educated, stable career, decent credit, owns a condo, athletic, has never been in jail, no kids, loves his momma…the works!She had a Georgia accent, a kind soul, and selfless politics.We met in Montana when I flew out to cover a concert series in the late '90s."This girl, she was smart and feminist and said she was bisexual," Elizabeth continued. You'll be married in 10 years.'" It's hard when your wedding day is used as evidence that your life is a sham. That relationship--surprising, shocking, and thrilling--jolted my identity.On a certain level, though, I understand the confusion. My 20s and 30s were a series of big loves with men and women, but the biggest one of all was Amy, an electrifying, alluringly butch musician who happened to be one half of the Indigo Girls.For more information please send an email to We are crossing state lines and hope that those in northern Mass or southern New Hampshire would like to join us for the Boston Bisexual Women's Network's monthly brunch.Bring a potluck brunch item and/or drinks to share.
A few more dates go by and you learn that he is more than ready to settle down and have kids, matter of fact, his views on marriage and family life practically mirror your own. You start to think ‘Where has this man been all my life! ’ Later that night he calls you to tell you how much he likes you and enjoys being with you, you gladly return the compliment and just as you feel yourself floating up to cloud nine he says “I really like you and would love to get to know you better, but I must be honest. We’ll just assume his wives knew because, well, I’m sure we all knew before he told us.
I also started to realize that strict monogamy may not be the best idea for me.
I would very much like to be able to love more than one person, but my husband is and wants us to remain strictly monogamous. I think my parents would accept my bisexuality, especially since I'm married to a man and therefore not actually dating women, but they're still busy processing the fact that I'm not Christian.
Since I was attracted to boys, I just assumed I was straight and ignored the attraction I felt for girls.
I never gave myself the chance to think about it because I was safe where I was.Anyway, on paper Clive, and many like him, meet every single qualification on the lists many women keep and appear to be perfect marriage material, except for the fact that they are bisexual men. Do you scratch a man off the list and call your girls to complain, yet again, about how you can’t find a good man? The plight of the single black woman is well documented; a simple Google search will yield tons of articles discussing our issues when it comes to marriage.
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